November 5, 2009
The dumbing of America
It's Andy 2 Times again, venting about the dumbing of America. I was in a channel flipping induced semi coma, when I stumbled upon one of the fifty million "I love" shows on VH1. I realize that MTV stopped playing music shortly after the Regan administration left office, but I had hoped that VH1 would somehow set themselves apart from all the other crappy pseudo-networks. Don't get me wrong, I love Behind the music and...well I guess that's all, but now I have be inundated with horny balding rock stars, 2 no name and no talent brothers looking for love (and the nearest free clinic that gives out penicillin shots like they were Pez). Even Tiffany "New York" Pollard (who's voice has the timbre of a busy signal) is still grasping on to her fifteen minutes of fame tighter than Roman Polanski holding a lolly-pop. Don't even get me started on the classy ass on "Laguna Beach," "The Hills" and "The City." Whiny, hotties bitching about high school style drama in your mid-20's qualifies as quality programming? Whenever I think of these celeb-u-tards, I envision Gollum's never ending pursuit for his "precious"...and we all know how that turned out. I'm not saying that they should be thrown in a giant volcano (I can't afford the air fare to Hawaii). I'm just saying maybe if we could somehow get them close enough the edge of one, the heat and bright light will distract them. Then Mother nature will do her thing and add a little chlorine to the gene pool.

Love, Peace & Chicken Grease

Andy 2 Times

Posted by Andy 2 Times at 8:08 AM